http://www.govtech.com/gt/118753
Great article on an increasing trend of Teens loosing sleep over the urge to text into the wee hours of the night. The result is a lack of focus and poor achievement.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
How To Focus on Your School Work
How To Focus on Your School Work
Learning how to focus and get something done is about more than just good grades. It's the foundation for success in life. Mastering the skills of getting organized, staying focused, and seeing work through to the end will help in just about everything you do. You probably know the basics by now, but here's a refresher.
Get Organized
Organization is the first step. It makes everything else a little easier.
Keep your assignments and class information together in binders, notebooks, or folders that are organized by subject. You might want to set up a file drawer at home to keep track of research, returned assignments, and other things you want to hold on to.
If you find yourself stuffing loose papers in your bag or grabbing different notebooks for the same class just because they're close at hand, it's time to stop and regroup. Take an evening to get things organized again.
Maybe you can't carry different spiral-bounds for every class. One solution is to carry a binder that has separate sections. Another idea is to take notes in one notebook and at the end of each day rewrite them in a separate binder. This takes more time, but it is a great study skill because it allows you to read, write, and hopefully summarize all that was important during the schoolday. The more you review material, the more likely you are to remember it.
Whatever you choose, your system has to work for you. If it doesn't, change it until you find what does. It's a great way to learn about yourself and what works for your unique needs.
Plan Ahead
Most likely, you're on your own when it comes to progress and work on assignments. It can feel great to be your own boss, especially if you're a good one. Don't leave things until the last minute, though you'll only end up working twice as hard to do half as well. Nerves and anxiety make it hard to stay focused and do a good job.
Set Deadlines
At the beginning of each semester, make a calendar of due dates. Be sure you know what the main assignments are (if the teacher doesn't mention them at the start of the semester, ask) and what format they will take (a report, presentation, group project, etc.). Set clear goals.
Keep these questions in mind when organizing your calendar: What's the final product? When do certain components need to be completed? Answering these allows you to prioritize assignments by due dates, level of difficulty, and completion time.
Include nonacademic commitments on your calendar, such as team practices, drama rehearsals, etc. This will help you see when things might hit crunch time later in the semester.
Give yourself mini-deadlines for the stages of each project planning, research, drafting, revising, and creating a final product.
Enforce deadlines
Decide how you'll enforce your deadlines. For example, will you reward yourself for meeting them? Ask you friends or parents to check in with you about your mini-deadlines so that you don't put them off. (Watch out if you ask parents to help, though. When they do, remember that they're not nagging you ...you asked them to check in!)
If you have difficulty meeting deadlines but are making an attempt to improve your study skills and organization, talk with your teacher. He or she can help you to create reasonable short-term goals for a particular project or test.
Oh, no! That's due in 2 days! If something slips by and you find yourself surprised by a due date or stuck with very little turnaround time, try not to freak out. Do a breathing exercise to feel calm and focused. Then outline an approach to tackling the work. You can make an hourly or daily calendar of deadlines if that helps you structure your time.
If you're a perfectionist, it helps to remember that everyone can lose track of something once in a while. If this happens a lot, though, you need to get more organized.
Set Your Space
You need a good workspace — someplace clean and orderly and quiet enough to focus. (If you can, avoid trying to study in places that are the center of activity, like the kitchen.) It helps to have a specific place that's set aside for homework so that when you sit down, your mind knows you're there to work and can help you focus more quickly.
Your bedroom, a study, or any other room where you can get away from noise and distractions is an ideal place to focus. It's best to study at a desk or table where you can spread your work out. You'll also need a chair that's comfortable: It should support your lower back and allow you to keep both feet on the floor in front of you. To make studying less of a strain on your eyes, be sure you have enough light.
Finally, make sure the room you're in is comfortable. This sounds basic, but if you're too hot, too cold, or distracted by your pet hamster spinning on his wheel, you won't be able to concentrate as effectively.
Have resources handy. What do you need in your work area in order to avoid interruptions? Books, supplies, notes, research sources? Keep these in one place so you don't have to go off in search of printer paper, a stapler, or a book you know you just saw around here somewhere.
Be sure you have what you need before you head to the library or elsewhere to work on projects and papers. And each night, check that you've packed everything you need for class the next day including assignments to turn in.
Get Focused
Think multitasking is a useful skill? Think again! A March 2005 study by the Kaiser Family Foundation found that nearly a third of students ages 8 to 18 don't concentrate on their homework alone. Instead, they "multitask" by talking on the phone, listening to music, watching TV, and IMing friends.
Studies show that when people do lots of things at once they tend to do a worse job on all of them than if they'd focused on just one thing at a time. So when you multitask as you study, you're less likely to absorb and retain the information you need to do well on that test.
This doesn't mean you have to study in total silence. Things like TV are bad distractions that you'll want to avoid. But listening to music can actually help some people concentrate — especially if they have to study in a noisy environment.
Just be sure that you tune in to good study music that isn't going to sidetrack you into singing the lyrics and dancing all over your room when you're supposed to be focused on the French Revolution. If you find yourself reading the same page over and over or fixing mistakes that you made as you worked, these are clues that the music isn't helping.
Chances are, you'll use the computer for papers and the Web for research while you're doing homework. This makes it hard to avoid temptations like IM and surfing. Set aside separate time just for IM and email so that when it's work time, you can shut them down and focus. (It's hard, but there's nothing like the little ding of a new message to take the focus off of what you're trying to do especially if it's not your favorite subject!)
Stay focused. One way to keep your concentration is to take breaks but make sure they're scheduled ones. Building a 15-minute break in after 45 minutes of studying can help your mind stay fresh and focused.
Get a change of scenery by leaving the room you've been working in. Exercise is a great way to clear your head and allow the mind to absorb what you've just studied. So now's the time to put on that song that makes you dance and sing! Do some stretches, walk the dog around the block, kick a ball in the backyard, or call a friend. Just make sure you get back to your studies when your 15 minutes are up.
It's normal for the mind to wander occasionally. If you find yourself getting distracted and thinking about other things, pull your attention back into a study groove as soon as possible. If daydreaming and fantasizing seem to take up too much of your work time, set aside a separate time to write in your journal or write fiction. That'll give you another incentive to get your homework done.
Get It Done!
In summary, here's a quick checklist of things that can help you focus:
DO know your deadlines.
DO make a calendar of stages and final due dates.
DO include social events on this calendar for time management.
DO understand the assignment and expectations.
DO give yourself a quiet place to study with all the materials you need.
DO give yourself brief breaks.
DON'T put work off until the last minute; you'll be too frantic to focus.
DON'T do your homework late at night or in bed.
DON'T let yourself be bored; find the aspect of the project or paper that interests you — if you're dying of boredom, something's not right.
If you need more tips on staying focused, ask a teacher, school counselor, or a parent for help. It's their job to assist in your learning.
Learning how to focus and get something done is about more than just good grades. It's the foundation for success in life. Mastering the skills of getting organized, staying focused, and seeing work through to the end will help in just about everything you do. You probably know the basics by now, but here's a refresher.
Get Organized
Organization is the first step. It makes everything else a little easier.
Keep your assignments and class information together in binders, notebooks, or folders that are organized by subject. You might want to set up a file drawer at home to keep track of research, returned assignments, and other things you want to hold on to.
If you find yourself stuffing loose papers in your bag or grabbing different notebooks for the same class just because they're close at hand, it's time to stop and regroup. Take an evening to get things organized again.
Maybe you can't carry different spiral-bounds for every class. One solution is to carry a binder that has separate sections. Another idea is to take notes in one notebook and at the end of each day rewrite them in a separate binder. This takes more time, but it is a great study skill because it allows you to read, write, and hopefully summarize all that was important during the schoolday. The more you review material, the more likely you are to remember it.
Whatever you choose, your system has to work for you. If it doesn't, change it until you find what does. It's a great way to learn about yourself and what works for your unique needs.
Plan Ahead
Most likely, you're on your own when it comes to progress and work on assignments. It can feel great to be your own boss, especially if you're a good one. Don't leave things until the last minute, though you'll only end up working twice as hard to do half as well. Nerves and anxiety make it hard to stay focused and do a good job.
Set Deadlines
At the beginning of each semester, make a calendar of due dates. Be sure you know what the main assignments are (if the teacher doesn't mention them at the start of the semester, ask) and what format they will take (a report, presentation, group project, etc.). Set clear goals.
Keep these questions in mind when organizing your calendar: What's the final product? When do certain components need to be completed? Answering these allows you to prioritize assignments by due dates, level of difficulty, and completion time.
Include nonacademic commitments on your calendar, such as team practices, drama rehearsals, etc. This will help you see when things might hit crunch time later in the semester.
Give yourself mini-deadlines for the stages of each project planning, research, drafting, revising, and creating a final product.
Enforce deadlines
Decide how you'll enforce your deadlines. For example, will you reward yourself for meeting them? Ask you friends or parents to check in with you about your mini-deadlines so that you don't put them off. (Watch out if you ask parents to help, though. When they do, remember that they're not nagging you ...you asked them to check in!)
If you have difficulty meeting deadlines but are making an attempt to improve your study skills and organization, talk with your teacher. He or she can help you to create reasonable short-term goals for a particular project or test.
Oh, no! That's due in 2 days! If something slips by and you find yourself surprised by a due date or stuck with very little turnaround time, try not to freak out. Do a breathing exercise to feel calm and focused. Then outline an approach to tackling the work. You can make an hourly or daily calendar of deadlines if that helps you structure your time.
If you're a perfectionist, it helps to remember that everyone can lose track of something once in a while. If this happens a lot, though, you need to get more organized.
Set Your Space
You need a good workspace — someplace clean and orderly and quiet enough to focus. (If you can, avoid trying to study in places that are the center of activity, like the kitchen.) It helps to have a specific place that's set aside for homework so that when you sit down, your mind knows you're there to work and can help you focus more quickly.
Your bedroom, a study, or any other room where you can get away from noise and distractions is an ideal place to focus. It's best to study at a desk or table where you can spread your work out. You'll also need a chair that's comfortable: It should support your lower back and allow you to keep both feet on the floor in front of you. To make studying less of a strain on your eyes, be sure you have enough light.
Finally, make sure the room you're in is comfortable. This sounds basic, but if you're too hot, too cold, or distracted by your pet hamster spinning on his wheel, you won't be able to concentrate as effectively.
Have resources handy. What do you need in your work area in order to avoid interruptions? Books, supplies, notes, research sources? Keep these in one place so you don't have to go off in search of printer paper, a stapler, or a book you know you just saw around here somewhere.
Be sure you have what you need before you head to the library or elsewhere to work on projects and papers. And each night, check that you've packed everything you need for class the next day including assignments to turn in.
Get Focused
Think multitasking is a useful skill? Think again! A March 2005 study by the Kaiser Family Foundation found that nearly a third of students ages 8 to 18 don't concentrate on their homework alone. Instead, they "multitask" by talking on the phone, listening to music, watching TV, and IMing friends.
Studies show that when people do lots of things at once they tend to do a worse job on all of them than if they'd focused on just one thing at a time. So when you multitask as you study, you're less likely to absorb and retain the information you need to do well on that test.
This doesn't mean you have to study in total silence. Things like TV are bad distractions that you'll want to avoid. But listening to music can actually help some people concentrate — especially if they have to study in a noisy environment.
Just be sure that you tune in to good study music that isn't going to sidetrack you into singing the lyrics and dancing all over your room when you're supposed to be focused on the French Revolution. If you find yourself reading the same page over and over or fixing mistakes that you made as you worked, these are clues that the music isn't helping.
Chances are, you'll use the computer for papers and the Web for research while you're doing homework. This makes it hard to avoid temptations like IM and surfing. Set aside separate time just for IM and email so that when it's work time, you can shut them down and focus. (It's hard, but there's nothing like the little ding of a new message to take the focus off of what you're trying to do especially if it's not your favorite subject!)
Stay focused. One way to keep your concentration is to take breaks but make sure they're scheduled ones. Building a 15-minute break in after 45 minutes of studying can help your mind stay fresh and focused.
Get a change of scenery by leaving the room you've been working in. Exercise is a great way to clear your head and allow the mind to absorb what you've just studied. So now's the time to put on that song that makes you dance and sing! Do some stretches, walk the dog around the block, kick a ball in the backyard, or call a friend. Just make sure you get back to your studies when your 15 minutes are up.
It's normal for the mind to wander occasionally. If you find yourself getting distracted and thinking about other things, pull your attention back into a study groove as soon as possible. If daydreaming and fantasizing seem to take up too much of your work time, set aside a separate time to write in your journal or write fiction. That'll give you another incentive to get your homework done.
Get It Done!
In summary, here's a quick checklist of things that can help you focus:
DO know your deadlines.
DO make a calendar of stages and final due dates.
DO include social events on this calendar for time management.
DO understand the assignment and expectations.
DO give yourself a quiet place to study with all the materials you need.
DO give yourself brief breaks.
DON'T put work off until the last minute; you'll be too frantic to focus.
DON'T do your homework late at night or in bed.
DON'T let yourself be bored; find the aspect of the project or paper that interests you — if you're dying of boredom, something's not right.
If you need more tips on staying focused, ask a teacher, school counselor, or a parent for help. It's their job to assist in your learning.
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
To Live a Life, You Must Have a Job
It takes a remarkable amount of money to live what is considered to be a "normal" American lifestyle. It is this simple fact that forces you to get a job.
Most people miss this fact of life until they are well into their 20s or 30s. By then it is more difficult to do anything about it. If you start thinking about it as a teenager, however, you gain a tremendous amount of control over your life. Given that you have to have a job, why not have a fun one? Why not have a job you really enjoy? Why not have a job that pays you $100,000 per year or $1,000,000 per year rather than $20,000? Why not? You WILL have a job. There is no way around it. You might as well make it a good one.
If you look at life this way, then you can start to formulate four questions at a very early age:
What is a "good" job?
What do I need to do to get a good job?
What kind of jobs are out there?
How can I get better jobs throughout my life?
If you start asking and answering these questions now, as a teenager, when you have a lot of free time and no expenses, you are doing yourself a huge favor. You can accelerate the process tremendously. By the time you are 25 you will be well on your way while the rest of your peers are still standing around trying to figure out what is going on.
What Is a Good Job?
Here are some of the things you want to be thinking about as you consider your employment options. A good job has the following characteristics:
You enjoy it
It pays well
The payment model matches your personality
It gives you the opportunity to learn and grow
It has advancement potential
All of these elements are important. The first one, however, is the most important. You are going to be working 8 to 10 hours a day for the rest of your life. You might as well enjoy it. The "pays well" part is also nice but might be irrelevant if you are truly happy in your job. Given a choice between "truly happy" and "rich," most people would choose "truly happy" in an instant. What fun is it to be rich if you are miserable?
The payment model is important because certain payment models work well for some people but not for others. There are several different payment models in use in this country. Here are a few examples:
Volunteer work—You receive no pay for your efforts.
Piece work—You receive a payment for completing a specific task. You might see this sort of payment model in a garment factory (where a person is paid for each piece of clothing he or she completes), but could also be considered the model for delivery companies, trucking companies, etc. that pay by the trip. Even a doctor, who charges each patient, is in a sense doing piece work.
Commission work—Similar to piece work but applied to sales positions. You are paid a percentage of each sale you make. This model is common for Realtors, car salesmen, etc.
Gratuity work—Some or most of your income comes from tips.
Hourly work—You are paid for each hour you spend on the job.
Salaried work—You are paid a fixed amount per year.
Self-employed—You own a business (a restaurant, printing company, consulting firm, car repair shop, lawn-care service, etc.) and you take home the profits from that business.
You can have a good job under any of the different payment models listed above. For example, if you are making $50 or $75 an hour you are doing very well, and that hourly rate is common for both high-end software developers and high-end electricians, plumbers and welders. High-end sales people working on a commission basis can make a very good living under the commission model. For example, Realtors typically make 7% on the sale of a house (to be technically accurate, the listing agent takes half and the selling agent takes half and the realty office takes a cut as well, but you get the idea). Therefore, a Realtor who lists and sells just one $200,000 house every month can do extremely well. If you are an actor getting paid per show you are doing piece work, and if you are making $10,000 per weekly show you are doing very well indeed. Waiters and waitresses at a fancy restaurant can clear $40,000 per year on tips alone. The point is, you can make good money under lots of different payment models. The key is to find the model that best fits your personality.
When most people think of a "good job" what they have in mind is a salaried position. A typical low-end salaried position has the following characteristics:
Pays $25,000-30,000 per year
Provides free or low-cost health insurance for the employee and family
Possibly provides other types of insurance: dental, life, disability and so on
Provides at least two weeks of paid vacation time per year
Provides some amount of paid sick time
Provides a 401(k) retirement plan with some level of employer matching
Provides a good level of "upward mobility," meaning that you can see a promotion path to better positions in the future.
Compared to a minimum wage hourly job, a salaried arrangement looks very nice. For example, in an hourly job you can take vacation or get sick, but your income is cut off during the time you are out. The "upward mobility" part of a salaried position is also important. Once you are in a company, you have the opportunity to rise to higher positions as you gain experience.
The fact that you are only making an hourly minimum wage right now tells you something. You are only "worth" $5 an hour. How do you earn more? What might make you more valuable? How do you find a "good job" for yourself? In the next post I will try to help you to understand what makes the difference between a minimum wage worker and a highly paid professional.
Most people miss this fact of life until they are well into their 20s or 30s. By then it is more difficult to do anything about it. If you start thinking about it as a teenager, however, you gain a tremendous amount of control over your life. Given that you have to have a job, why not have a fun one? Why not have a job you really enjoy? Why not have a job that pays you $100,000 per year or $1,000,000 per year rather than $20,000? Why not? You WILL have a job. There is no way around it. You might as well make it a good one.
If you look at life this way, then you can start to formulate four questions at a very early age:
What is a "good" job?
What do I need to do to get a good job?
What kind of jobs are out there?
How can I get better jobs throughout my life?
If you start asking and answering these questions now, as a teenager, when you have a lot of free time and no expenses, you are doing yourself a huge favor. You can accelerate the process tremendously. By the time you are 25 you will be well on your way while the rest of your peers are still standing around trying to figure out what is going on.
What Is a Good Job?
Here are some of the things you want to be thinking about as you consider your employment options. A good job has the following characteristics:
You enjoy it
It pays well
The payment model matches your personality
It gives you the opportunity to learn and grow
It has advancement potential
All of these elements are important. The first one, however, is the most important. You are going to be working 8 to 10 hours a day for the rest of your life. You might as well enjoy it. The "pays well" part is also nice but might be irrelevant if you are truly happy in your job. Given a choice between "truly happy" and "rich," most people would choose "truly happy" in an instant. What fun is it to be rich if you are miserable?
The payment model is important because certain payment models work well for some people but not for others. There are several different payment models in use in this country. Here are a few examples:
Volunteer work—You receive no pay for your efforts.
Piece work—You receive a payment for completing a specific task. You might see this sort of payment model in a garment factory (where a person is paid for each piece of clothing he or she completes), but could also be considered the model for delivery companies, trucking companies, etc. that pay by the trip. Even a doctor, who charges each patient, is in a sense doing piece work.
Commission work—Similar to piece work but applied to sales positions. You are paid a percentage of each sale you make. This model is common for Realtors, car salesmen, etc.
Gratuity work—Some or most of your income comes from tips.
Hourly work—You are paid for each hour you spend on the job.
Salaried work—You are paid a fixed amount per year.
Self-employed—You own a business (a restaurant, printing company, consulting firm, car repair shop, lawn-care service, etc.) and you take home the profits from that business.
You can have a good job under any of the different payment models listed above. For example, if you are making $50 or $75 an hour you are doing very well, and that hourly rate is common for both high-end software developers and high-end electricians, plumbers and welders. High-end sales people working on a commission basis can make a very good living under the commission model. For example, Realtors typically make 7% on the sale of a house (to be technically accurate, the listing agent takes half and the selling agent takes half and the realty office takes a cut as well, but you get the idea). Therefore, a Realtor who lists and sells just one $200,000 house every month can do extremely well. If you are an actor getting paid per show you are doing piece work, and if you are making $10,000 per weekly show you are doing very well indeed. Waiters and waitresses at a fancy restaurant can clear $40,000 per year on tips alone. The point is, you can make good money under lots of different payment models. The key is to find the model that best fits your personality.
When most people think of a "good job" what they have in mind is a salaried position. A typical low-end salaried position has the following characteristics:
Pays $25,000-30,000 per year
Provides free or low-cost health insurance for the employee and family
Possibly provides other types of insurance: dental, life, disability and so on
Provides at least two weeks of paid vacation time per year
Provides some amount of paid sick time
Provides a 401(k) retirement plan with some level of employer matching
Provides a good level of "upward mobility," meaning that you can see a promotion path to better positions in the future.
Compared to a minimum wage hourly job, a salaried arrangement looks very nice. For example, in an hourly job you can take vacation or get sick, but your income is cut off during the time you are out. The "upward mobility" part of a salaried position is also important. Once you are in a company, you have the opportunity to rise to higher positions as you gain experience.
The fact that you are only making an hourly minimum wage right now tells you something. You are only "worth" $5 an hour. How do you earn more? What might make you more valuable? How do you find a "good job" for yourself? In the next post I will try to help you to understand what makes the difference between a minimum wage worker and a highly paid professional.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Teenagers lack experience - Teenage Illusion Module
You may find it hard to believe that teenagers are naïve. In fact, you may think I am an idiot for saying it. So why do I say it, and why is it one of the key facts of life? Here is something to ponder that will help you to understand: No one can teach himself or herself to read. Think about that for a minute. If you were stranded on a desert island and if you didn’t know how to read, could you teach yourself to read if a whole box of books washed up on shore? No. Once you understand what that says, apply it to your lack of experience. It is only in recognizing your naïve nature and understanding what "lack of experience" means that you can go about fixing the problem. You cannot start to become "worldly" and "informed" until you understand your naïveté. Then you can start to learn your way out of it by asking questions, reading books and carefully observing the world around you. It is the act of recognizing that you lack experience that lets you correct the problem and become an adult. The sooner you come to that realization, the more successful you can be.
Why might you find it hard to believe that you might be naïve? It is because there is a component inside your head right now that I am going to call the "Teenage Illusion Module" (TIM). I am making the TIM up for the sake of this discussion, but if you think about your brain in this way it will help you to understand something about where you are right now. The Teenage Illusion Module is designed to send signals into your head telling you that you are the smartest person in the world, that you know everything and that all of the adults around you are idiots. This module forms during puberty, grows to some maximum size and then collapses in most people by the age of 23. When I was a teenager my TIM consumed approximately half of my head.
Mark Twain had an interesting saying about the Teenage Illusion Module: "When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." Of course Twain’s father had not changed at all—it was Twain himself who changed. Twain’s father became smart about the time Twain’s TIM collapsed. Twain simply could not see how smart his parent was until then. That problem afflicts all teenagers. As soon as you realize, for whatever reason, that you don’t have all of the answers but that many of the adults standing all around you actually do, you begin to become an adult. The sooner that transformation occurs, the better.
Why does the Teenage Illusion Module form? It has to do with the evolution of our species. Think about a young bird. It lives in a nice nest. It is warm. It plays with its brothers and sisters all day without a care or concern. Its parents bring it food constantly. Why in the world would a young bird ever want to leave this pleasant place? There is no reason. In fact, it would be silly to leave a cushy situation like this. But say, about the time in life when it is physically able to leave the nest, this thing forms in a young bird’s brain that generates messages like, "Your parents are idiots! You can find better food than this! You could build a much better nest than this one! And their feathers are so boring! You have much cooler feathers! It’s time to get out of here!" The teenager bird hears these messages inside its head all day long, day after day. Eventually it gets so disgusted with its parents that it flies away and creates its own nest.
That is approximately what is happening inside your own head and in your own life. Evolution has wired in this Teenage Illusion Module to encourage you to leave the nest. It is a release mechanism. The problem is, we live in modern technological society and you are not a bird. In human society you cannot simply go out and pluck worms from the lawn. People succeed in this society because they are smart and because they know other smart people. That is a fact of life. Your TIM actually is doing you a tremendous disservice in this day and age because it turns out that adults hold a gigantic amount of knowledge that would be extremely useful to you. They will give you this knowledge gladly. All you have to do is ask. Your TIM, unfortunately, is telling you to ignore this wealth of information.
The size of the Teenage Illusion Module varies from teenager to teenager. I know a number of teenagers who are blessed with a properly-sized TIM. "Properly-sized" means that the TIM is large enough to encourage independence but small enough to discourage rebellion. Teenagers with a properly-sized TIM can become very successful very quickly. Things are much easier for them. It is possible to have too small a TIM. In that case the teenager never gets up enough energy and courage to leave home. Others have very large TIMs. As I said, mine was huge. Some unfortunate people have TIMs that persist through old age, never collapsing and never allowing them to see the world around them clearly.
Let’s say that you are convinced that your parents, your brothers and sisters, your teachers and most of the people around you are idiots. Let’s say that you believe that you are the smartest person in the universe and have all of the answers to all of the world’s problems if anyone would take the time to listen. Or let’s say that you are less opinionated than that and simply find it difficult to imagine that you might be naïve. That is your TIM talking.
Let’s try this approach. Find someone who has an infant. Sit and watch the infant for five minutes. Notice an important fact about that infant: the infant is totally helpless. You can see that. Everyone can see that. An infant knows how to do perhaps four things: suckle, sleep, smile and cry. You and I can agree that infants are helpless. An infant is also as ignorant as a person gets. Infants have no knowledge but that which is built in.
Now let’s say that every person learns things continuously, all through life, at the same rate. So if you are 6 years old you are learning a certain number of things per day, and if you are 60 you are learning at that same rate. You simply change the things you learn as you mature.
Here is another way to think about it. When you are 16 and you talk to an 8-year old, you can see quite obviously that the 8-year old is naïve. An 8-year-old kid knows nothing about love, about life, about algebra, about money. Eight-year-old kids know about cookies and candy and toys. They know nothing. It is obvious. When people who are 32 look at you at 16, they are thinking exactly the same thing. A 16-year old knows nothing about careers, the job market, housing, credit ratings, child rearing, long-term relationships and so on. In the grand scheme of things, a 16-year old knows nothing. That’s a fact of life.
Go back and look at your infant again. Another thing you will notice is that infants are outrageously self-centered. There is not a single cell in their brains wired for empathy, generosity or compassion. When an infant is hungry, it screams. When it is sleepy, it screams. When it is uncomfortable, it screams. If it doesn’t like the person who is holding it, it screams. Very self-centered. As you go through life your self-centeredness decreases, but teenagers are still remarkably self-centered.
So, there it is. I am telling you that you are naïve right now. You are going to do one of two things at this point. You will either cast this post/advice aside because it is obviously written by an idiot. If you do that, please do me a favor: Come back and read it in about 10 years. You will be amazed.
The other alternative is to read this and the other posts and see what you can discover about your situation. Hopefully, the above examples helped you to understand a little bit about your current position. Maybe you can learn something by reading this blog. Maybe, by learning about the immutable facts of life, you can work with the system instead of always butting your head up against it. You might be much happier and more successful as a result.
The goal of this blog spot is to show you how the world works so that you can begin to take advantage of it. This blog seeks to show you the facts of life. You will learn these facts of life one way or another. It’s just that the earlier you learn them, the faster you can take advantage of them and the more successful you will be as a result. If you can shut your TIM off while you are reading this blog and let a few of these ideas seep in, you might be amazed by what you will learn.
Why might you find it hard to believe that you might be naïve? It is because there is a component inside your head right now that I am going to call the "Teenage Illusion Module" (TIM). I am making the TIM up for the sake of this discussion, but if you think about your brain in this way it will help you to understand something about where you are right now. The Teenage Illusion Module is designed to send signals into your head telling you that you are the smartest person in the world, that you know everything and that all of the adults around you are idiots. This module forms during puberty, grows to some maximum size and then collapses in most people by the age of 23. When I was a teenager my TIM consumed approximately half of my head.
Mark Twain had an interesting saying about the Teenage Illusion Module: "When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." Of course Twain’s father had not changed at all—it was Twain himself who changed. Twain’s father became smart about the time Twain’s TIM collapsed. Twain simply could not see how smart his parent was until then. That problem afflicts all teenagers. As soon as you realize, for whatever reason, that you don’t have all of the answers but that many of the adults standing all around you actually do, you begin to become an adult. The sooner that transformation occurs, the better.
Why does the Teenage Illusion Module form? It has to do with the evolution of our species. Think about a young bird. It lives in a nice nest. It is warm. It plays with its brothers and sisters all day without a care or concern. Its parents bring it food constantly. Why in the world would a young bird ever want to leave this pleasant place? There is no reason. In fact, it would be silly to leave a cushy situation like this. But say, about the time in life when it is physically able to leave the nest, this thing forms in a young bird’s brain that generates messages like, "Your parents are idiots! You can find better food than this! You could build a much better nest than this one! And their feathers are so boring! You have much cooler feathers! It’s time to get out of here!" The teenager bird hears these messages inside its head all day long, day after day. Eventually it gets so disgusted with its parents that it flies away and creates its own nest.
That is approximately what is happening inside your own head and in your own life. Evolution has wired in this Teenage Illusion Module to encourage you to leave the nest. It is a release mechanism. The problem is, we live in modern technological society and you are not a bird. In human society you cannot simply go out and pluck worms from the lawn. People succeed in this society because they are smart and because they know other smart people. That is a fact of life. Your TIM actually is doing you a tremendous disservice in this day and age because it turns out that adults hold a gigantic amount of knowledge that would be extremely useful to you. They will give you this knowledge gladly. All you have to do is ask. Your TIM, unfortunately, is telling you to ignore this wealth of information.
The size of the Teenage Illusion Module varies from teenager to teenager. I know a number of teenagers who are blessed with a properly-sized TIM. "Properly-sized" means that the TIM is large enough to encourage independence but small enough to discourage rebellion. Teenagers with a properly-sized TIM can become very successful very quickly. Things are much easier for them. It is possible to have too small a TIM. In that case the teenager never gets up enough energy and courage to leave home. Others have very large TIMs. As I said, mine was huge. Some unfortunate people have TIMs that persist through old age, never collapsing and never allowing them to see the world around them clearly.
Let’s say that you are convinced that your parents, your brothers and sisters, your teachers and most of the people around you are idiots. Let’s say that you believe that you are the smartest person in the universe and have all of the answers to all of the world’s problems if anyone would take the time to listen. Or let’s say that you are less opinionated than that and simply find it difficult to imagine that you might be naïve. That is your TIM talking.
Let’s try this approach. Find someone who has an infant. Sit and watch the infant for five minutes. Notice an important fact about that infant: the infant is totally helpless. You can see that. Everyone can see that. An infant knows how to do perhaps four things: suckle, sleep, smile and cry. You and I can agree that infants are helpless. An infant is also as ignorant as a person gets. Infants have no knowledge but that which is built in.
Now let’s say that every person learns things continuously, all through life, at the same rate. So if you are 6 years old you are learning a certain number of things per day, and if you are 60 you are learning at that same rate. You simply change the things you learn as you mature.
Here is another way to think about it. When you are 16 and you talk to an 8-year old, you can see quite obviously that the 8-year old is naïve. An 8-year-old kid knows nothing about love, about life, about algebra, about money. Eight-year-old kids know about cookies and candy and toys. They know nothing. It is obvious. When people who are 32 look at you at 16, they are thinking exactly the same thing. A 16-year old knows nothing about careers, the job market, housing, credit ratings, child rearing, long-term relationships and so on. In the grand scheme of things, a 16-year old knows nothing. That’s a fact of life.
Go back and look at your infant again. Another thing you will notice is that infants are outrageously self-centered. There is not a single cell in their brains wired for empathy, generosity or compassion. When an infant is hungry, it screams. When it is sleepy, it screams. When it is uncomfortable, it screams. If it doesn’t like the person who is holding it, it screams. Very self-centered. As you go through life your self-centeredness decreases, but teenagers are still remarkably self-centered.
So, there it is. I am telling you that you are naïve right now. You are going to do one of two things at this point. You will either cast this post/advice aside because it is obviously written by an idiot. If you do that, please do me a favor: Come back and read it in about 10 years. You will be amazed.
The other alternative is to read this and the other posts and see what you can discover about your situation. Hopefully, the above examples helped you to understand a little bit about your current position. Maybe you can learn something by reading this blog. Maybe, by learning about the immutable facts of life, you can work with the system instead of always butting your head up against it. You might be much happier and more successful as a result.
The goal of this blog spot is to show you how the world works so that you can begin to take advantage of it. This blog seeks to show you the facts of life. You will learn these facts of life one way or another. It’s just that the earlier you learn them, the faster you can take advantage of them and the more successful you will be as a result. If you can shut your TIM off while you are reading this blog and let a few of these ideas seep in, you might be amazed by what you will learn.
Is it time to ignore your peers and become an adult?
Think about the question, "Who would you rather be like: a teenager or an adult?" You might answer it, "I’d rather be like the teenager." Why? One reason is because you are a teenager. Birds of a feather flock together, and all that. Another reason is because you understand teenagers and are comfortable with them. The reason you are comfortable with teenagers is because you talk to them all day. You may not do that with adults. Maybe that’s because you think adults are boring and stupid. If you feel that way, perhaps you should reconsider. How can an adult who is making $50,000 or $150,000 a year be stupid? Especially when it is totally impossible for a normal teenager to do the same? You are, potentially, flocking with the wrong group. Start spending time with adults and learning to understand their world, so you can become a successful adult much more quickly.
The reason you might think adults are stupid is because you do not understand them. The adult world is a intricate, complex and interesting place. Because it is intricate and complex, however, it takes time and experience to understand this environment. You need to talk to adults to start learning about their environment. The sooner you start learning the intricacies, the better off you are in the long run. The sooner you become an adult, the sooner you can start reaping the rewards of being an adult.
The Opinions of Your Peers
For many young people high school can be a horrible experience. This is especially true when you are attempting to be successful. When you are being successful, you will have HATERS. Your peers will spend a good deal of their time putting you down. Dont make the mistake of actually listening to them and taking their opinions to heart. If the adults around you are telling you, "Your doing great", then that counts for something.
Peer Pressure:
You have heard about "peer pressure." Notice that the words "peer pressure" are always used in a negative sense. Your "peers" are encouraging you to smoke. Your "peers" are encouraging you to do drugs. Your "peers" are encouraging you to have sex at age 15. Your "peers" are encouraging you to go smash your teacher’s mailbox with a baseball bat. Your "peers" are encouraging you to spray graffiti on cars. Whatever. Why in the world would you want to do any of that? What does it accomplish? Have you ever had a successful adult businessman pull up to you in his Lexus and say, "Come on, let’s go bash mailboxes together! I have a bat in the back seat!" Of course not.
Why is it that adults don’t go sneaking around smashing mailboxes? Because it is pointless. There are much better things to do once you know they are possible. You, as a teenager in America, are standing inside a trillions of dollars economy. That means that every year people willingly hand each other trillions in return for goods and services. If you can figure out a legitimate way to get even the tiniest slice of that money to flow your way, then you will be set. You will be able to accomplish almost any goal you can imagine. "Goals?" you might be asking. This might be a good time to get some. It is probably the case that you have some already and don’t realize it. Many of your peers don’t have any goals, and that is why their lives are often so random and pointless. Instead of trying to figure out a better way to kill your neighbor’s cat, you could instead be learning about our society and economy and figuring out a way to build a business or career that will make you a millionaire.
You can ignore your "peers" completely if you like. Simply walk away from them and never look back. You will be much better off if you spend your time with adults and become an adult yourself.
The reason you might think adults are stupid is because you do not understand them. The adult world is a intricate, complex and interesting place. Because it is intricate and complex, however, it takes time and experience to understand this environment. You need to talk to adults to start learning about their environment. The sooner you start learning the intricacies, the better off you are in the long run. The sooner you become an adult, the sooner you can start reaping the rewards of being an adult.
The Opinions of Your Peers
For many young people high school can be a horrible experience. This is especially true when you are attempting to be successful. When you are being successful, you will have HATERS. Your peers will spend a good deal of their time putting you down. Dont make the mistake of actually listening to them and taking their opinions to heart. If the adults around you are telling you, "Your doing great", then that counts for something.
Peer Pressure:
You have heard about "peer pressure." Notice that the words "peer pressure" are always used in a negative sense. Your "peers" are encouraging you to smoke. Your "peers" are encouraging you to do drugs. Your "peers" are encouraging you to have sex at age 15. Your "peers" are encouraging you to go smash your teacher’s mailbox with a baseball bat. Your "peers" are encouraging you to spray graffiti on cars. Whatever. Why in the world would you want to do any of that? What does it accomplish? Have you ever had a successful adult businessman pull up to you in his Lexus and say, "Come on, let’s go bash mailboxes together! I have a bat in the back seat!" Of course not.
Why is it that adults don’t go sneaking around smashing mailboxes? Because it is pointless. There are much better things to do once you know they are possible. You, as a teenager in America, are standing inside a trillions of dollars economy. That means that every year people willingly hand each other trillions in return for goods and services. If you can figure out a legitimate way to get even the tiniest slice of that money to flow your way, then you will be set. You will be able to accomplish almost any goal you can imagine. "Goals?" you might be asking. This might be a good time to get some. It is probably the case that you have some already and don’t realize it. Many of your peers don’t have any goals, and that is why their lives are often so random and pointless. Instead of trying to figure out a better way to kill your neighbor’s cat, you could instead be learning about our society and economy and figuring out a way to build a business or career that will make you a millionaire.
You can ignore your "peers" completely if you like. Simply walk away from them and never look back. You will be much better off if you spend your time with adults and become an adult yourself.
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